Comments on: [cancer] The edges in my head http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/ Jay Lake's Official Web Site Thu, 09 Feb 2012 00:58:08 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Jay http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4225 Jay Tue, 16 Jun 2009 11:07:37 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4225 Thank you. Thank you.

]]> By: Todd http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4221 Todd Tue, 16 Jun 2009 05:30:16 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4221 Take a few words of advice from someone who's been there. Four years out from the last treatment, and the doctor said I had less than a 50/50 chance of getting this far. OF COURSE YOU'RE FUCKING SCARED!!! YOU'D BE A DAMNED FOOL NOT TO BE!!! That doesn't mean you aren't brave. Courage is in how you deal with your fear. Do whatever you have to to hold it together. If that means falling apart once a week in the privacy of your own heart or the arms of your Beloved THAT'S FINE. You do what you need to so you can do what you have to. That's the real test of courage under fire, and so far you're doing just fine. This isn't like a fist-fight which will be over in couple minutes or a an accident where you'll crash or escape in the next three seconds. This is a fight for your life in slow motion with no enemy except your own body which has turned on you. You'd have to be certifiably insane to be matter of fact about this. What's more, you will go into that room and let them hurt you. And you will do it as often as you have to. You will do it first because of how much you love your woman and your child. That was obvious the first time I saw you with either of them. And you will do it because of how much you love your own life. That's the real proof of bravery. I have no doubt at all that you will pass it. Like I said before, if there's anything we can do to make it easier get in touch. That's a serious offer. Take a few words of advice from someone who’s been there. Four years out from the last treatment, and the doctor said I had less than a 50/50 chance of getting this far.

OF COURSE YOU’RE FUCKING SCARED!!!
YOU’D BE A DAMNED FOOL NOT TO BE!!!

That doesn’t mean you aren’t brave. Courage is in how you deal with your fear. Do whatever you have to to hold it together. If that means falling apart once a week in the privacy of your own heart or the arms of your Beloved THAT’S FINE. You do what you need to so you can do what you have to. That’s the real test of courage under fire, and so far you’re doing just fine.

This isn’t like a fist-fight which will be over in couple minutes or a an accident where you’ll crash or escape in the next three seconds.

This is a fight for your life in slow motion with no enemy except your own body which has turned on you. You’d have to be certifiably insane to be matter of fact about this.

What’s more, you will go into that room and let them hurt you. And you will do it as often as you have to. You will do it first because of how much you love your woman and your child. That was obvious the first time I saw you with either of them. And you will do it because of how much you love your own life.

That’s the real proof of bravery. I have no doubt at all that you will pass it.

Like I said before, if there’s anything we can do to make it easier get in touch. That’s a serious offer.

]]> By: Scott Havens http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4204 Scott Havens Mon, 15 Jun 2009 14:34:24 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4204 I think bravery is just getting up every morning, and continuing onwards with both life and your dreams to the best of your ability. The dark places only let those bright spots become even more illuminated. And I hope, as we all do, that this is all just a coagulated glitch cluster. But if it's not, your courage will go along way towards helping you...as well as all the abiity to recognize that truth and share it with others as you so eloquently do. I agree with the poster above me: to share this all so nakedly with us all is so brave. I know that bravery will put you in good stead in the days and weeks to come. I think bravery is just getting up every morning, and continuing onwards with both life and your dreams to the best of your ability. The dark places only let those bright spots become even more illuminated.
And I hope, as we all do, that this is all just a coagulated glitch cluster. But if it’s not, your courage will go along way towards helping you…as well as all the abiity to recognize that truth and share it with others as you so eloquently do. I agree with the poster above me: to share this all so nakedly with us all is so brave. I know that bravery will put you in good stead in the days and weeks to come.

]]> By: Steve Buchheit http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4202 Steve Buchheit Mon, 15 Jun 2009 13:10:47 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4202 Courage - Fear = Stupidity. Being afraid is a completely normal feeling with this, Jay. Even the most courageous people I know have their moments of breaking down. It means you're human. And hopefully it is all coincidence and all you've gone through is for naught. But if it isn't, this part will prepare you to deal with what is next. Bravery is dealing with the issue, and it's even more brave to share with the rest of us. That response right there puts you ahead of the curve. Courage – Fear = Stupidity. Being afraid is a completely normal feeling with this, Jay. Even the most courageous people I know have their moments of breaking down. It means you’re human.

And hopefully it is all coincidence and all you’ve gone through is for naught. But if it isn’t, this part will prepare you to deal with what is next. Bravery is dealing with the issue, and it’s even more brave to share with the rest of us. That response right there puts you ahead of the curve.

]]> By: Bridget Coila http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4193 Bridget Coila Mon, 15 Jun 2009 04:08:47 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4193 Agreeing with everyone else here... you ARE brave and I admire your ability to handle things face-on in the face of the fear. B Agreeing with everyone else here… you ARE brave and I admire your ability to handle things face-on in the face of the fear.

B

]]> By: Deidre http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4192 Deidre Mon, 15 Jun 2009 03:37:20 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4192 I have to agree. You are extremely brave! You continue to write. You continue to live your life. You aren't cowering in a dark corner just waiting for the future to come find you. I think you are doing the least cowardly thing possible and I admire that. I have to agree. You are extremely brave! You continue to write. You continue to live your life. You aren’t cowering in a dark corner just waiting for the future to come find you. I think you are doing the least cowardly thing possible and I admire that.

]]> By: thelittlefluffycat http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4191 thelittlefluffycat Mon, 15 Jun 2009 03:33:56 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4191 {{{JL}}} What she said. It would be crazy if you *weren't* feeling this way. The big deal is getting up every morning, doing what you need to do -- including the crying or the screaming or whatever -- and telling the truth about it, most of all to yourself, but also to everyone else who might be able to make use of it in some way. That's huge. That is so huge. {{{JL}}} What she said.

It would be crazy if you *weren’t* feeling this way. The big deal is getting up every morning, doing what you need to do — including the crying or the screaming or whatever — and telling the truth about it, most of all to yourself, but also to everyone else who might be able to make use of it in some way.

That’s huge. That is so huge.

]]> By: Mary Robinette Kowal http://www.jlake.com/2009/06/14/cancer-the-edges-in-my-head/comment-page-1/#comment-4189 Mary Robinette Kowal Mon, 15 Jun 2009 03:27:28 +0000 http://www.jlake.com/?p=8512#comment-4189 Personally, I think you are very brave. To me, brave is being scared out of your pants and continuing on anyway. Personally, I think you are very brave. To me, brave is being scared out of your pants and continuing on anyway.

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