Jay Lake: Writer

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[Cancer]

[cancer|food] What I miss the most

This is medically trivial, and the light of my complete absence of nausea and vomiting, probably a blessing in aome sense, but one of the things I miss the most through the chemotherapy process is the simple ability to enjoy my food.

Lately I’ve been having olfactory hallucinations, for want of a better term. Or very strong flashes of memory perhaps. I’ll suddenly taste crispy bacon and eggs over medium. Or kung pao chicken sharp on my tongue. Or enchiladas Suiza, rolling in cheese, white sauce and salsa verde. I know if I sought them out right now, they wouldn’t taste anything like I wish for them to. Too many things burn my mouth (cinnamon, nuts, peppers) and everything else tastes as if it were coated in plastic, if I can taste it at all.

But god I miss food. Such a minor thing to be upset about, in the larger scheme of health and recovery, but there you have it.

Hell, I’d just like buttered toast to taste right.

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