[cancer] What I think I hate the most

I hate being crazy in the head from medical stress. This is bad now, even before the cognitive and emotional disruptions of the chemotherapy drugs themselves.

Already I am not being the person I want to be. Already I am not being the person I am. And I’m so very painfully conscious of the staggering cost I paid in my personal life for this disconnect during the last chemo go-round.

I hate this.

One thought on “[cancer] What I think I hate the most

  1. Jan says:

    All I can say is take deep breaths. That will help you deal with the stress easier, not get rid of it though, just help.

    I so feel for you Jay, but as hard as the next round is I know you will get through it and that will be that, and you will be able to happily live afer, and beyond.

    All my positive thoughts are with you always.

    Jan

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