Jay Lake: Writer

[cancer|writing] Emerging from chemo infusion session 5

Well, it’s official. Zyprexa really sucks. Except not taking Zyprexa sucks more.

Back during session one of this round chemotherapy (last May), I had terrible problems with nausea and vomiting, that lasted into the week after. We fiddled my meds, and I finally wound up on Zyprexa, which is an antischizophrenic medication that happens to be effective at suppressing nausea. The problem is that when I take Zyprexa, I get very drowsy but cannot sleep. (Which is a weird state to be in, let me tell you.)

So I had to add Lorazepam (Ativan) to the mix, to get me over the top of the sleeplessness. Which means I’m now taking two soporifics. (Incidentally, Lorazepam is also psychoactive as an anti-anxiety drug, as well as also being an anti-nausea drug. Ain’t pharmaceuticals grand?) This in turn led to me sleeping dramatically longer during the chemotherapy infusion session as well as at home on the chemo weekend. The extreme fatigue and lassitude I associate with my prior chemo experience also chased me hard into the week.

Last night was the first night since this past Thursday when I have not taken the Zyprexa/Lorazepam double whammy. This morning is the first morning since this past Thursday that I have woken up before the alarm clock, as is my usual wont, and have not woken up already exhausted.

Also, I noticed a lot more depression and fussiness than I had expected. Some of that must be an emotional winding down post-Worldcon, and some of it is overtly situational, but I sure hope I don’t have this rough a ride for each of the next seven chemo sessions.

I’m sure some of this past weekend’s depth of fatigue comes from post-Worldcon recovery as well, but mostly this is chemo helper drug side effects. It mean going forward that I’ll have to budget five days instead of four for lost productivity in each two-week chemotherapy cycle. Which is what it is, but remains damned annoying.

Speaking of such issues, I’m about five days behind on my writing goals. I’d expected to have Sunspin‘s first volume, Calamity of So Long a Life, done in first draft by the end of August. Not quite: I lost more time at Worldcon than I expected, and I lost a day just now. Close enough that I don’t feel wiped out by the missed deadline, but still missed.

Yesterday I got my edit letter from casacorona regarding Kalimpura. My goal there is to have the revisions back in to her (and la agente) by the end of September. I’m confident of making that schedule. Then some revising on Sunspin until I either run out of gas completely or have a solid first revision pass on Calamity of So Long a Life.

All of that, of course, balanced around the chemotherapy and its discontents.

Tags: Books, Calamity, Cancer, Conventions, health, Personal, Sunspin, Writing

Posted: 5:45 am Wed August 31 2011 | Comments(1) |

[photos] Your Wednesday moment of zen

Your Wednesday moment of zen.

Frontier restaurant, Albuquerque, NM. © 2007, 2011, Joseph E. Lake, Jr.

This work by Joseph E. Lake, Jr. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Tags: Photos, zen

Posted: 5:24 am Wed August 31 2011 | Comments(0) |

[links] Link salad for a late summer Wednesday

Why Summer Vacations (and the Internet) Make You More Productive

What is the Sex of 17? — People think of many things, even numbers, as being either male or female. (Via David Goldman.)

Roll cloud over Wisconsin — Another awesome APOD photo.

Why the Next Steve Jobs Will be in Energy, Not Computers — Looking around, what problem, what opportunity in any way resembles the earliest era of the PC? There’s only one: energy.

Milky Way galaxy re-created — For you see, we are all living in a jar of Tang!

Russia identifies cause of space freighter failure

Arctic sea ice will be below average again this year — There goes reality with that darned liberal bias again. Facts can sure be inconvenient things when you are a true believer.

Beware of Rick Perry, the French cuff cowboy — You’d think we’d have learned something from Dubya, about wilful ignorance, foreign wars, and runaway spending. You know, all that stuff the angry white people in the Tea Party now blame on Obama.

Republicans Against Science — Now, we don’t know who will win next year’s presidential election. But the odds are that one of these years the world’s greatest nation will find itself ruled by a party that is aggressively anti-science, indeed anti-knowledge. And, in a time of severe challenges — environmental, economic, and more — that’s a terrifying prospect. This is what comes of privileging counterfactual crap like Creationism when trolling for votes. Are you still proud of your Republican party?

Richard Dawkins on Perry as well.

?otD: Raisins or dates?

8/31/2011
Writing time yesterday: 0.0 hours (chemotherapy recovery)
Body movement: 30 minute stationary bike ride
Hours slept: 8.25 hours (overnight plus naps)
Weight: 223.4
Currently reading: The Iron Duke by Meljean Brook

Tags: Cool, Culture, Links, Personal, Photos, Politics, Science, Tech

Posted: 5:23 am Wed August 31 2011 | Comments(2) |

[photos] $7,000 worth of chemo chaser

In case you were wondering what a $7,000 injection looked like. This is my post-infusion Neulasta injection.

© 2011, Joseph E. Lake, Jr.

This work by Joseph E. Lake, Jr. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Tags: Cancer, health, Photos

Posted: 5:49 am Tue August 30 2011 | Comments(0) |

[photos] Your Tuesday moment of zen

Your Tuesday moment of zen.

Grafitti, Albuequerque, NM. © 2007, 2011, Joseph E. Lake, Jr.

This work by Joseph E. Lake, Jr. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Tags: Photos, zen

Posted: 5:46 am Tue August 30 2011 | Comments(0) |

[links] Link salad kicks it in MacArthur Park

Snow Queen and the Slump of Print — jimchines runs some numbers.

First Mars Astronauts May Grow Their Own Food — A high-tech ‘kitchen garden’ may be the answer to the worry about what astronauts may eat on a long journey to Mars.

NASA May Build Nuclear Reactors on Moon and Mars

Blood Biomarker Is Linked with Death — Those with higher levels of a particular molecule were found to be more likely to die of heart disease or cancer in the next dozen years.

Are Airline Pilots Forgetting How to Fly?

Bachmann Campaign: Bachmann Spoke ‘In Jest’ When She Said God Was Communicating Via Earthquakes And Hurricanes — Compassionate conservatisms indeed. Also, this just in: monkeys might fly out of my butt.

Republicans Against Science — Paul Krugman on Rick Perry and the wilful ignorance of the antiscience stance of the GOP.

More on the same from Bad Astronomer Phil Plait.

Republicans Dis-Invited From Labor Day Parade — Gee, I wonder why?

?otD: Who left the cake out in the rain?

8/30/2011
Writing time yesterday: 0.0 hours (chemotherapy)
Body movement: 30 minute stationary bike ride
Hours slept: 8.5 hours (overnight plus naps)
Weight: 224.0
Currently reading: Schlock Mercenary: Emperor Pius Dei by Howard Tayler

Tags: Links, Personal, Politics, Publishing, Religion, Science, Travel

Posted: 5:44 am Tue August 30 2011 | Comments(0) |

[cancer] To sleep, perchance to wake the frak up

Between 10:30 Friday and 5:00 am today, I slept 45 hours. That’s out of 65-1/2 hours. FOLFIRI really, really fries me. On top of this, I spent yesterday afternoon and evening being horribly depressed about everything — cancer, relationships, general health. After the post-surgical break and my flurry of social and professional activity at Renovation, I now feel like Atlas once more shrugging the world onto his shoulders.

I do recognize the difference between situational depression and chronic depression, having experienced both in my past medical history. And Ghu knows I have enough to be depressed about. But I swear there’s a connection between how much I oversleep and my mental state. On the other side of the balance sheet, I weathered the weekend as well as I could hope. Sleep != nausea. We like this equation. Also on the plus side, I’m actually fairly rested and ready to go back to work here in a few minutes.

Hates it all, I does. Hates the nasty chemotherapies.

P.S. Not sure if there will be writing today. Need to see how well brain defrosts from chemo, and how much energy the body can really bring to bear.

Tags: Cancer, Conventions, health, Personal

Posted: 5:51 am Mon August 29 2011 | Comments(1) |

[photos] Your Monday moment of zen

Your Monday moment of zen.

Baby Abraham, Albuequerque, NM. © 2007, 2011, Joseph E. Lake, Jr.

This work by Joseph E. Lake, Jr. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Tags: Photos, zen

Posted: 5:28 am Mon August 29 2011 | Comments(0) |

[links] Link salad wallows into Monday

My open questions thread is still open: [ jlake.com | LiveJournal ]

Mainspring has a gorgeous German cover as Die Räder der Welt: Roman — (Via my translator Marcel R. Bülles.)

Saint Gaudens’ Three Guiding Principles — Art writing guru James Gurney quoting some good advice for creative Producers.

What Killed American Lit. — Today’s collegians don’t want to study it—who can blame them?

New Economics Rewrite Book Business

Examining the Mystery of Skeleton, Sugar and Sex — Oh, the opportunities for cheap laughs on this one.

No Surprise for Bisexual Men: Report Indicates They Exist

A few Catholics still insist Galileo was wrong — They say Earth is the center of the universe, embracing church teachings of four centuries ago. That idiocy is no more silly than evolution denail, and just as worthy of intellectual respect.

Can the Government Suppress Lies?

?otD: FOLFIRI, anyone?

8/29/2011
Writing time yesterday: 0.0 hours (chemotherapy)
Body movement: 30 minute stationary bike ride
Hours slept: 9.5 hours (overnight plus naps, yikes!)
Weight: 223.8
Currently reading: The Magician King by Lev Grossman

Tags: healthcare, Links, Mainspring, Personal, Politics, Process, Religion, Science, sex, Writing

Posted: 5:27 am Mon August 29 2011 | Comments(2) |

[cancer] Chemo session 5, day 3

Bleah. Pump just started beeping. I am done with this chemo session. Now to crawl back out into recovery. So much sleep, so many hiccups.

Tags: Cancer, health, Personal

Posted: 10:17 am Sun August 28 2011 | Comments(0) |