[Cancer, Personal]
[personal|cancer] Bottoming out, I hope
I slept about fifteen hours yesterday, counting roughly three hours of napping plus twelve hours overnight. And yesterday was probably the worst day for fatigue that I’ve experienced during this chemo sequence. Or, really, ever. I hope like heck it was peak fatigue, and that I’ll be a little better today. It’s going to make celebrating Christmas tomorrow a bit tough if I can’t keep my eyes open.
Both the nap dreams/daydreams and the overnight dreams were about food. Pizza, largely, though in some unusual forms, such as made on a Prius floormat, or being used to burgle a safe. (No, I can’t explain now how in my dreams pizza is useful as a safecracking tool. And floormat pizza is just gross.) Sometimes I dream about hamburgers, but not yesterday. Food… food… food… The problem of course is the intersection between my rare physical cravings, my food aversions, my food dysfunctions, my chemo-damaged mouth, and the desires romping around in my backbrain for food that tastes like anything but aquarium tubing.
Oh well, we all have our little obsessions.
Today I am laying very low, tomorrow have two small family events, and that’s it. So if fatigue is my lot, I’m all tooled up for it. Whatever you’re doing, however you’re observing (or ignoring) the season, do it well and be happy. And eat something that tastes good, just for me.
Posted: 8:37 am Sat December 24 2011 |
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You are reading the blog of Jay Lake, speculative fiction writer and author of hundreds of short stories, many novels, and winner of the John W. Campbell Award.
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Tamara Kaye Sellman
December 24th, 2011 at 11:56 amJay, have a peaceful holiday, k? BTW thx for the recommendation for the film, Hugo. I insisted my family see it last night (they’d not heard of it) and I think they liked it even
more than I did!!! I also learned my oldest is a closet steam punk fan! Hugs to you and wishing you an excellent comeback in 2012!!! Tamara
Rick York
December 24th, 2011 at 12:56 pmWould “peak fatigue” be an oxymoron? One way or another, we all hope that the next few days and the next many years will see you moving to a true peak. Happy Whatever and may the New Year be a healthy as well as happy one.
Harald Striepe
December 24th, 2011 at 1:22 pmHave a happy holiday!
Cora
December 24th, 2011 at 4:42 pmHave a good and peaceful holiday season, Jay!
As for eating something tasty, how about herring salad according to my grandmother’s recipe and some pork curry tomorrow?