[Cancer]
[cancer] You, me and my state of mind
First and foremost, I need to thank literally hundreds of people, from dear friends to total strangers, for the outpouring of support I’ve experienced over the past few days. Because yes, in short, this resurgence of cancer is a terrible, horrifying event that I have barely begun to process.
I have received e-cards, social media comments, direct emails, and much more. Donations have been made in my name. Donations have been made directly to me. People have asked how they can help me, help ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=1){kind=small}
the_child
I love you all. I wish I could respond to everyone individually.
Thank you all.
Meanwhile, I continue to vacillate between rage, abject terror, and denial. It’s a hell of a ride. And it’s only going to get a whole lot worse.
As for the details, phone calls continue to fly between various quarters as I set the pins for the next nine months or so. Also, I’m off to the nuclear medicine department this morning for a PET scan. We’re not expecting anything new, this is intended to confirm the CT scan. Also, we’re looking for additional small, undetected metastases.
As long time readers know from my previous comments on PET scans, I call this the Department of Giant Radioactive Spiders. Because, you know, it’s weird. Any medical procedure that involves lead-lined boxes, tungsten-jacketed syringes, and intravenous fluid the color of irradiated Gatorade can’t help but be weird.
Wish me and my tumors well.
In other news, Lisa Costello heads back east Saturday morning. After that, I’ll be at Portland GEAR Con much of the weekend. Come down and visit if you’re in the greater Portland metropolitan area. Off to Omaha Monday on the last of my usual business trips prior to about May of next year.
I’ve been thinking I need to name my three tumors. Here’s some ideas I’m noodling. Please suggest your own thoughts in comments. There will be a poll soon.
- Manny, Moe and Jack
- Larry, Curly and Moe
- Emerson, Lake and Palmer
- Shirley, Goodness and Mercy
- Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego
- Caspar, Balthazaar and Melchior
- Tinker, Evers and Chance
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Posted: 5:26 am Fri August 17 2012 |
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You are reading the blog of Jay Lake, speculative fiction writer and author of hundreds of short stories, many novels, and winner of the John W. Campbell Award.
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Comments
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I wish you well, and in large quantities. I refuse, however, to wish your tumors well.
I know, right?
How about Buttmuncher, Snotsucker, and Poopypants, the three Tumor Goblins?
I vote for Alnitak, Mintaka, Alnalam. I’m with you in both spirit and cancer. Since I’m undergoing radiotherapy, I’m taking supplements that tend to both attack cancer and make cancer cells more radiosensitive (turmeric, which contains anti-cancer curcumin,D3 plus K2, quercetin, and some non-fun mushrooms. On the emotional side, I’m using the Sedona Method rather than my usual Yogic contemplative techniques. The basic Sedona approach is welcoming whatever feelings arise, and then welcoming any desire to change those feelings; next, experiencing your personal connection with the previous feelings, and finally doing your best to simply let them go, at least for the moment. So far, this has helped free me from wasting the energy I need for healing on turmoil.
I propose Santorum, Cain, and Bachmann. And we all know what happened to them
Many wishes for health and a long life, Jay. Notwithstanding your current situation, your ability to look cataclysm in the eye and keep moving ahead is uniquely Jay.
Hello Jay…. I’m very sorry to read your going through this again and all the real implications of this reoccurrence. I hope today’s procedure shows nothing else is awry. You and your family are in my thoughts…
William, Bert and Tom
Blinkin, Winkin and Nod
Butcher, Baker, and Candlestick Maker
Conan, Tarzan, and John Carter
Strange, Charmed, and Top
Alnitak, Alnilam and Mintaka
Oops, completely blanked on:
Urd, Skuld, and Verdandi
Very, very sorry to hear about this development.
I did laugh at what you say about the nuclear medicine department – in Radiology we call it “Unclear Medicine.” Always somewhat disconcerting to give people doses that we protect ourselves from with lead walls and aprons.
As for the names, I’d go with the Stooges.
Good luck with everything, and I wish you all the best.
Sacco, Vanzetti and Bob.
Chris
Dearest Jay, I do wish you well, but certainly do not wish well for your tumors. I do not want them to do well, if you don’t mind. I want them to leave.
You have prevailed thus far, and will continue to do so. You know this in your heart.
Fran
Has to be Larry, Curly, Moe. See them as ridiculous rather than symbols of evil.
Cancer cells are after all, us (our DNA and cells) gone awry…
If you’re feeling particularly anti-organized-religion, how about Faith, Hope, and Charity? Or Graham, Bakker, and Falwell?
Otherwise, it’s hard to go wrong with Emerson, Lake, and Palmer… especially considering the album cover of Love Beach, which as close as we’re going to get to putting your tumors in Hawaiian print shirts.
I’d go for names of villians that died a horrible fiery death and disappeared forever.
You might want to ditch Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego–IIRC, they SURVIVED being thrown in the furnace.
I couldn’t actually bring myself to name my tumors–I didn’t want to do anything to make them more sympathetic or justify their existence.
I’ll wish you well, but I hope you’ll forgive me if I do NOT wish your tumors well. *hugs*
I heartily concur that they need to be named something ridiculous, and for which disappears quickly:
Backstreet Boys, N’Sync, and Jonas Brothers.
Candles lit in your honor today Jay.
Eeeny, meeeny, miney, and no Moe.
Any thoughts about a bucket list?
Jay,
Maybe call those suckers Wynken, Blynken and Nod. They come fishing for trouble, they are a surreal bad dream, but ultimately, they’re scooped up and shipped out in a shoe.
Which is to say, they get the boot.
Wishing you a complete cure from this, my friend. I and many others are keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. We think about you often, every day.
Hang in there, bro.