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[contest] Caption contest winner

The caption contest has a runaway winner. With 102 votes cast, the winner at 26 votes is Matt H.


Tai Shan always ended up giving his lunch money to the bigger pandas, and he never looked forward to gym class.

Runner up is with: “You have failed me for the last time, Admiral.”

Matt H wins a hardback of Green Powell’s | Amazon ] (when it’s available) or another of my books. Excellent work!

[contests] Caption contest returns!

A new caption contest! Usual rules apply. I’ll collect captions in comments here (at both and until I get bored with it, then build a voting poll. Please try to limit the length of your entries or they may become truncated in the poll code.

Prize will be a hardback of Green (when it’s available) or another of my books of the winner’s choice. Have fun!


[contests] Time to vote in the newest Green ARC contest

The latest contest for an ARC of Green Amazon ] is now live with a voting poll.

Note that this one was a little different. I asked people to nominate someone else to receive an ARC. Due to the limitations of the poll code, some of the nominations have been truncated, so be sure to check out the comments on the original posts [ | LiveJournal ].

And yes, there will be goodies for the person whose nominee wins.

So what are you waiting for? Go vote!

[contests] Voting poll for the latest Green ARC contest

Which unsuspecting reader or reviewer should have a Green ARC inflicted upon them?

View Results

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[contests] Time for another GREEN ARC contest


Green Amazon ] will be out in a few months. So it’s time for another ARC giveaway contest. As usual, this will be a two-stage process. I’ll have people post entries here for a few days, then I’ll make a voting poll.

This time, your job is to nominate someone else to receive an ARC of Green, and tell us why. Be as silly or fun or funny if you want, but no gratuitous cruelty or snark. So nominate your favorite blogger or commenter or LJ-BFF right here.

[contests] The caption contest voting poll

Remember the caption contest from December? [ | LiveJournal ].

Having finally mastered my WordPress polling plug-in, I now mount the voting poll. Just as a reminder, here are the photos in question, followed by the poll.

Photo by .

Photo by .

Which caption best captures the spirit of the photos above?

  • stonetable: Jay winds his Mainspring. (15%, 8 Votes)
  • kazdreamer: Okay, which joker put Super Glue on my socks? (13%, 7 Votes)
  • pauljessup: And now watch as I give birth to myself! One, two, oh crap. I'm stuck. (11%, 6 Votes)
  • Steve Buchheit: Wanna see my surgery scar? (9%, 5 Votes)
  • Gordsellar: While other members of the tribe watched, this elder performed what one group member claimed was a gesture “Invoking the Corn and Onion Spirits” and “Repelling the Harsh Winds of the North (5%, 3 Votes)
  • katster: Unfortunately, Jay found that his efforts to fold himself into a tesseract didn't quite work as he had planned. (5%, 3 Votes)
  • drachin8: Anyone got a lighter? (5%, 3 Votes)
  • Lee: Here we see Jay preparing to look for his next story idea. (4%, 2 Votes)
  • will_couvillier: Wow! Been a long time since I saw that! (4%, 2 Votes)
  • paulcarp: Jay Lake reveals secrets of getting published. (4%, 2 Votes)
  • summers_place: And for those of you unprepared for the switch to digital television, I present a primer on positions that may be helpful with antenna reception. Or not. (4%, 2 Votes)
  • R.S. Devin: Evidence that Jay may need to move to Nantucket. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • mikigarrison: If I can just get my ankles a little bit higher, my next novel will pop out, smooth as butter. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • suricattus: Author photo! (2%, 1 Votes)
  • jrbutcher: Are you sure everyone has one? (2%, 1 Votes)
  • mistymarshall: Just wait till you see what I can do with the rest of my body. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • musingaloud: And THAT, boys and girls, is your story entry point. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • frogworth: Remember that copy of The River Knows Its Own that I thought I'd sent you? Well I've found it, so COME AND GET IT!" (2%, 1 Votes)
  • magentamn: Soft-shelled author. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • autojim: And here the Lake presents Two Views of The Reason For Birth Control (2%, 1 Votes)
  • jenntheamazon: Oh, Look! A Jay Lake Pretzel. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • cscole: Finally! he muttered. After my summer health adventure, finally I can see what all the fuss was about. And as I suspected, the tuck and lift job they did is spectacular! (2%, 1 Votes)
  • ygolonac: A few more years of yoga and you'll be able to see Uranus. (2%, 1 Votes)
  • summers_place: I'm sure there's a reason I'm sitting like this... (0%, 0 Votes)
  • Jeremiah Tolbert: Right. Sarah! Where did we put the bleach? (0%, 0 Votes)
  • kara_gnome: See, this is what happens when you can't find the origami paper. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • livia_llewellyn: After 25 years, Madonna finally hits the wall. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • pmrabble: Self-colonoscopy demonstration (0%, 0 Votes)
  • drachin8: Now my death ray is complete! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • drachin8: Cra-a-ab people, cra-a-ab people, taste like crab, talk like people. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • jenntheamazon: Who says you never lose your flexibility from when you were a baby? (0%, 0 Votes)
  • xjenavivex: The Lazy-Boy ate my siamese twin. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • evaleastaristev: Look what I can do! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • evaleastaristev: Now...a little help please? I'm stuck! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • xjenavivex: Once in position, the Grinch was able to slide down the chimney! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • katster: You should see me do this in spandex! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • magentamn: Peek-a-boo! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • will_couvillier: See -- lose some colon, gain some flex! (0%, 0 Votes)
  • selfavowedgeek: Wii Kama Sutra, anyone? (0%, 0 Votes)
  • klingonguy: Just two more weeks of practice, and when you can get your ankles behind your head, you can start shooting the late-night infomercial for your yoga DVD. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • mevennen: Once again, Pretzel Boy demonstrates his superpower. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • lillypond: That's so wrong on so many levels. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • mistymarshall: I haz flexibility. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • summers_place: Just look what you made me do. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • Mark Siegal: Worst mug shots ever. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • Lee: Could someone with cancer do this? (0%, 0 Votes)
  • kproche: How to escape the Human Siamese Knot... step one: wiggle ears... (0%, 0 Votes)
  • fledgist: And then I told Vatsyavana, 'this position even you won't put in the Kama Sutra'. (0%, 0 Votes)
  • jeffsoesbe: Soon, Jay thought. Soon those lonely nights will be lonely no more. (0%, 0 Votes)

Total Voters: 55

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[contests] Results of the first Green ARC contest

The first Green ARC contest voting poll is now officially closed. The winner is , with 14 votes out of a total of 84 votes cast. The reason he should get a Green ARC?

“Hmmm, this has never worked before, but there’s always a first time… Because I’ll review it in Klingon!!!”

Congratulations to !

Also, if you’re still jonesing to win a Green ARC, go enter the current caption contest [ | LiveJournal ] before I close entries and make it into a poll.