Since the onset of my cancer in April of 2008, I’ve made over 700 blog posts about cancer, its treatments, and its impact on my life. Thousands of readers of my blog, from family and close friends to total strangers all across the Internet, have followed along with me as I’ve discussed my body, my emotions, even my sexuality as inflected by cancer.
What follows is an abbreviated index of those posts, culling out over 200 which have some significance and organizing them roughly by subject. Posts I consider the most important or most potentially useful to readers are emphasized in bold. Note that in some posts there is very frank discussion of bodily functions, sexuality and troubling emotions. I’ve tried to be as honest as possible.
Obviously, reading these posts is a bit of cherrypicking, as the full context is not always present. For those interested in the entire history of my cancer blogging, the master index is here. Otherwise, I hope this is educational and helpful to you.
Subjects: [ Initial Presentation | Second Presentation | Third Presentation | Fourth Presentation | Response from Others | Disease Progression ]
[ The Emotions of Cancer | Health Insurance and Costs | Living With Cancer | Sex and Cancer | The Treatments ]
[ Sex on chemo: a user’s guide to cancer and your love life ]
Date | Title | LiveJournal URL | WordPress URL |
Initial Presentation | |||
May 1, 2008 | [personal|cancer] I really go all the way to celebrate a book release | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Second Presentation | |||
May 14, 2009 | [cancer] Sometimes you’re the windshield, sometimes you’re the car bomb | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 17, 2009 | [cancer] Where the heart goes when the head doesn’t know | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 18, 2009 | [cancer] Some good news | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 22, 2009 | [cancer] By circuitous paths information accrues, being an update | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 10, 2009 | [cancer] Lies, damn lies and statistics | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 13, 2009 | [cancer] A visit with the oncologist | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 22, 2009 | [cancer] Big pink hammer hanging over my head | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 29, 2009 | [cancer] White tube blues | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 14, 2009 | [cancer] The magical land of health insurance | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 22, 2009 | [cancer] Cautious Optimism | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 27, 2009 | [cancer] More optimism, less caution, no chemo for now | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 22, 2009 | [cancer] The price of a single banana | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 26, 2009 | [cancer] Dept of things you never thought you’d say -or- Things get worse | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 5, 2009 | [cancer] Excising the nacho; or; the surgical plan | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 5, 2009 | [cancer] Reclaiming my hour | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 6, 2009 | [cancer] Let the medical TMI begin | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 7, 2009 | [cancer] Update on cancer, surgery and chemotherapy | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 8, 2009 | [cancer] Paging Baron Harkonnen to the operating theatre | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 8, 2010 | [cancer] The dawn of infusion day, the first of twelve | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 20, 2010 | [cancer] What the oncologist has said, coming off of chemo | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Third Presentation | |||
July 19, 2010 | [cancer] I have seen the future, brother, and it is murder | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 21, 2010 | [cancer] Now is the summer of our discontent | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 11, 2010 | [cancer] Having met with the liver surgeon… | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 15, 2010 | [cancer] Heading back under the knife | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 23, 2010 | [cancer] Flipping the bone yoyo | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 4, 2010 | [cancer] Getting so much better all the time | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Fourth Presentation | |||
April 18, 2011 | [cancer] Here we go again | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 19, 2011 | [cancer] Beginning the journey, again | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 28, 2011 | [cancer] Meeting with the surgical oncologist | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 17, 2011 | [cancer] The forthcoming surgery | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 19, 2011 | [cancer] Surgery | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 6, 2011 | [cancer] More oncology | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 24, 2011 | [cancer] And yet another potential problem rears its ugly head | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Response from Others | |||
May 3, 2008 | [cancer] Being patient in public with the big, magic cancer hat | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 20, 2009 | [cancer] Generosity | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 23, 2009 | [polls] Caption contest voting poll, Nachoectomy edition | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 30, 2009 | [contests] We have a winner | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 26, 2010 | [cancer] HCR, one conservative and me | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 8, 2010 | [cancer] Bald heads and sick kids | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 29, 2010 | [child|cancer] The Child asks questions | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 15, 2010 | [culture] Scenes from an oncology unit | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 24, 2010 | [cancer] Bad liver, good life | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 4, 2011 | [cancer] International Fuck Cancer Day | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 25, 2011 | [conventions] Buzzing through the Locus Awards | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 1, 2011 | [cancer] The things people say | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Disease Progression | |||
May 15, 2009 | [cancer] A bit of personal history, for newer readers | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 29, 2009 | [cancer] An interim update, in which our hero does nothing much | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 21, 2009 | [cancer] Just a bit more | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 22, 2010 | [cancer] A recap of my cancer history, for those who have tuned in since the beginning | LiveJournal | WordPress |
The Emotions of Cancer | |||
May 8, 2008 | [cancer] The Door That Never Opens Twice | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 4, 2008 | [cancer] “Is this concrete all around me, or is it in my head?” | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 26, 2008 | [cancer] Coming back from an invisible edge | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 27, 2008 | [personal] What I am thankful for | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 6, 2009 | [cancer] Flashbacks | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 10, 2009 | [cancer] A brief return of The Fear | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 4, 2009 | [cancer] Why I talk about the Fear, and about cancer in general | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 21, 2009 | [cancer] The Fear pays me a visit | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 19, 2009 | [cancer] Today’s state of the Jay | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 25, 2009 | [cancer] Slow dancing with the Fear | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 14, 2009 | [cancer] The edges in my head | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 6, 2009 | [cancer] Getting narrower | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 12, 2009 | [cancer] Things I am afraid of | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 12, 2009 | [cancer] Some days you fly, some days you fry | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 13, 2009 | [cancer] Fear, moving like a slow tide | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 20, 2009 | [cancer] Melting from stress | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 28, 2009 | [cancer] Tears fall down like missiles from the skies | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 5, 2009 | [cancer] Seeing the surgeon today | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 10, 2009 | [cancer] The frame of mind begins to narrow | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 12, 2009 | [cancer] A brief note on stress | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 18, 2009 | [personal|cancer] Randomosity | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 15, 2009 | [cancer] Depression | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 19, 2009 | [personal|cancer] Getting through another tough night | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 23, 2009 | [cancer] The dread and fear of things | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 3, 2010 | [cancer] Sometimes you hit the wall, sometimes the wall hits you | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 26, 2010 | [cancer] Chemo and its discontents | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 4, 2010 | [cancer] Heading into the third infusion | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 6, 2010 | [cancer] The lighter side of darkness, or, why I don’t live in the shadows | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 29, 2010 | [cancer] Updates, lessons and the nature of anger | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 31, 2010 | [cancer] On hope, some thoughts to balance pain | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 12, 2010 | [cancer] The slow return of the Fear | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 19, 2010 | [cancer] Almost time to go back to the well | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 20, 2010 | [cancer] The breaking of the ancient Western code | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 27, 2010 | [cancer] The feet, the future | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 1, 2010 | [cancer] Again with the coping | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 7, 2010 | [cancer] Walking through the valley of the shadow of metastasis | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 10, 2010 | [cancer] Fear and loathing in El Lago | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 12, 2010 | [cancer] Melting down like an ice cream cone on an August sidewalk | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 18, 2010 | [personal] Disclaimer: This post lacks wit or wisdom | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 29, 2010 | [cancer] Sleep, emotions, healing and life | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 30, 2010 | [cancer] The living dream of water | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 13, 2010 | [cancer] Reverb, echoes and bad behavior | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 14, 2010 | [cancer] Coping with the emotions, a bit more thereon | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 26, 2010 | [cancer|personal] The black dog barks | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 31, 2010 | [personal|cancer] The cost of living, or at least not dying | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 14, 2011 | [cancer] Coping with the future | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 24, 2011 | [cancer] Seeing it from the other side | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 28, 2011 | [cancer] More visits to the hospital | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 3, 2011 | [cancer] The return of the Fear, and the Child steps up | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 6, 2011 | [personal|cancer] Energy and health | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 25, 2011 | [cancer] Settling into a different mind | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 9, 2011 | [cancer] Flying into the forbidding future | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 29, 2011 | [cancer] Wishing for a different future | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 11, 2011 | [cancer] The mental fight | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 1, 2011 | [cancer] It is to update, also, mortality | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 22, 2011 | [cancer] The gentle subtlety of a sledgehammer to the skull | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 26, 2011 | [cancer] The strange emotional terrain of cancer | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 28, 2011 | [cancer] Living in the past | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 29, 2011 | [cancer] A bit more on why I worked on the index just now | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 3, 2011 | [cancer|personal] On unfairness and despair | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Health Insurance and Costs | |||
January 4, 2010 | [cancer] The magical power of health insurance to sap the soul and drain the mind | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 7, 2010 | [cancer] What’s my life worth to you? | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 22, 2010 | [cancer] Healthcare reform, and a question for my conservative friends | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 23, 2010 | [cancer] More on the weird billing, and costs of healthcare | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 22, 2010 | [politics] My initial thoughts on HCR, and some related links | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 28, 2010 | [cancer] Work, society and me | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 29, 2010 | [culture] The politics of American healthcare | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 12, 2011 | [cancer] Healthcare Weirdness | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 21, 2011 | [cancer] Following up on recent events, and more on costs | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Living With Cancer | |||
June 23, 2008 | [personal|cancer] Sleeping with the enemy | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 7, 2008 | [cancer] The IQ tests | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 27, 2008 | [cancer] The gifts of cancer | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 19, 2008 | [cancer] Redefining myself | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 2, 2008 | [personal] Living inside my body | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 7, 2009 | [personal] Living each day as if it were your last | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 20, 2009 | [cancer] A social disease | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 11, 2009 | [cancer] Live ghost walking | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 30, 2009 | [cancer] No one expects the Spanish Inquisition | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 2, 2009 | [cancer] Top 10 reasons why cancer is like the zombie apocalypse | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 31, 2009 | [cancer] How do I get through the bad bits? | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 19, 2009 | [cancer] Three maps, one road; and the Fear | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 3, 2009 | [cancer] Home, looking ahead | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 6, 2009 | [cancer] So now what? | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 15, 2009 | [cancer|personal] Crossing the streams | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 17, 2009 | [cancer] Crossing the Rubicon | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 4, 2009 | [cancer] Trying to put things into perspective | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 18, 2009 | [photos] The zombie hair, photographic evidence thereof | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 22, 2009 | [cancer] Learning to live with limitations, and why I talk about it so much | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 24, 2009 | [cancer|religion] Atheism, cancer and me | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 27, 2009 | [cancer] Life changes, the smaller kind; potty talk edition | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 28, 2009 | [cancer|personal] Walking, thinking, God again, and a bit of scavenging | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 7, 2010 | [cancer] The chemo ritual | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 9, 2010 | [cancer] A note on spoons | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 10, 2010 | [cancer] Chemotherapy, the overnight and day 3 experience | LiveJournal | WordPress |
January 15, 2010 | [personal|cancer] What rough Friday slouching toward the weekend waiting to be born | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 10, 2010 | [cancer] Sacrifices made for me by the petty gods of chemo | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 25, 2010 | [cancer] Recovery curves | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 26, 2010 | [cancer] The transient illusion of competency | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 3, 2010 | [photos|cancer] Taking the hair off … all of it | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 18, 2010 | [cancer|writing] Writing through cancer | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 9, 2010 | [cancer] Rough couple of days, in which I am someone I really don’t want to be | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 18, 2010 | [cancer] Sometimes you lose big, in small ways | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 22, 2010 | [cancer|personal] Wind, the sucking thereof | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 12, 2010 | [cancer|process] Writer’s block, or energy block? | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 17, 2010 | [cancer] A little better, some notes on sleep | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 17, 2010 | [books|cancer] The Specific Gravity of Grief | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 18, 2010 | [cancer] Fighting to stay awake | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 24, 2010 | [cancer] Sleeping my way through chemo | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 28, 2010 | [cancer] The dreams, please… | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 3, 2010 | [cancer] Continuing fog, with reefs | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 5, 2010 | [books] A bit more on The Specific Gravity of Grief, and where I’d like see it go | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 8, 2010 | [cancer] Wasted days and wasted nights… | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 10, 2010 | [cancer|food] What I miss the most | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 11, 2010 | [cancer] Holding up my end of the family | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 14, 2010 | [cancer] Sometimes it’s all about the grump | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 15, 2010 | [cancer] Closing in on the last session, a note on my heart | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 16, 2010 | [cancer] It’s all in the details, Mr. President | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 23, 2010 | [cancer] Forget Roger Daltrey, I hope I get old before I die | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 13, 2010 | [cancer] Hand, hand, fingers, thumb | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 2, 2010 | [cancer] Class privilege and chemotherapy | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 13, 2010 | [cancer] Dipping from the wells of disappointment | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 16, 2010 | [personal|cancer] Trying to keep up | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 17, 2010 | [cancer] A pair of semirandom lists | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 21, 2010 | [personal] Sleeping it off, walking and talking our way into the new day | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 24, 2010 | [personal] Fatherhood in the time of cancer | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 13, 2010 | [cancer] The recovery curve intersects with the catastrophe curve | LiveJournal | WordPress |
October 15, 2010 | [cancer] Looking back and forward | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 18, 2010 | [cancer] Just when you thought it was safe… | LiveJournal | WordPress |
February 2, 2011 | [cancer] Status check | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 25, 2011 | [personal|cancer] The good news and the bad | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 29, 2011 | [personal|cancer] This and that and Edith Throckmorton | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 8, 2011 | [personal|cancer] Thoughts and condolences | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 27, 2011 | [cancer] My theory of problems | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 27, 2011 | [cancer] Quick updates | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 29, 2011 | [cancer|photos] Owning the pain through tattoos | LiveJournal | WordPress |
April 30, 2011 | [cancer] What I think I hate the most | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 4, 2011 | [cancer] Becoming the invisible man | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 10, 2011 | [cancer] Hair and body | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 12, 2011 | [photos|cancer] My hair | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 11, 2011 | [cancer] Thinking through chemofail | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 19, 2011 | [photos] Coloring my chemo head | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 11, 2011 | [travel] The joys of flying as a cancer patient | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 18, 2011 | [cancer] On invisibility | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 7, 2011 | [personal] Conceiving audacity, antipodeal edition | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 8, 2011 | [cancer] On the significance of shirts | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 8, 2011 | [personal|travel] At the Mountains of Madness – more thoughts on Antarctica | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 15, 2011 | [process] Stakes and rising action, with a digression on dialog | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 26, 2011 | [writing] Catching up and falling behind | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 30, 2011 | [cancer] On Health | LiveJournal | WordPress |
Sex and Cancer | |||
November 4, 2009 | [cancer] The sexuality of cancer | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 21, 2009 | [personal|cancer] More reflections, plus sex! | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 21, 2009 | [cancer] More about sex | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 23, 2009 | [cancer] More sex, and other mysteries | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 24, 2009 | [cancer] A little bit more on sex and chemo | LiveJournal | WordPress |
March 14, 2010 | [cancer] Chemo, sex, Viagra and me | LiveJournal | WordPress |
The Treatments | |||
May 5, 2008 | [cancer] Wrapped in loving arms | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 9, 2008 | [cancer] “I was waiting on the pad / all systems were go” | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 26, 2008 | [cancer] The journey of a thousand lifetimes begins with a single stumble | LiveJournal | WordPress |
November 25, 2009 | [cancer] I may be some time | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 3, 2009 | [cancer] Beginning to blog the experience – the Ninja Moment | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 3, 2009 | [cancer|photos] More on love and surgery | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 16, 2009 | [cancer] More surgery today | LiveJournal | WordPress |
December 17, 2009 | [cancer] Zombie hair, and a Harkonnen heart plug | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 30, 2010 | [cancer] Pain, discomfort and the discontents of the insulted body | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 9, 2010 | [cancer] Of ports, scans and the smell of ancient oceans | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 15, 2010 | [cancer] The long, slow hello to normalcy | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 2, 2010 | [cancer] An abbreviated user’s guide to the chemotherapy experience | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 19, 2010 | [cancer] Time for another alien abduction experience | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 13, 2011 | [cancer] Off to the infusion center | LiveJournal | WordPress |
May 14, 2011 | [cancer] Chemotherapy session 1, day 1 – FOLFIRI | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 8, 2011 | [cancer] Catching up to the side effects | LiveJournal | WordPress |
June 30, 2011 | [cancer] Off to see the lizard | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 6, 2011 | [cancer|personal] Energy and focus | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 10, 2011 | [cancer] Living with the results of chemo | LiveJournal | WordPress |
July 24, 2011 | [cancer] Coming out of the hospital | LiveJournal | WordPress |
August 29, 2011 | [cancer] To sleep, perchance to wake the frak up | LiveJournal | WordPress |
September 6, 2011 | [cancer] How will we know if the chemo has succeeded? | LiveJournal | WordPress |